Friday First

My friend Leah..http://www.davisbabies.blogspot.com/..has come up with a wonderful idea....every Friday she suggested that we all post about our kids, neice, nephew, friend, family..you get the idea...first. I am excited to particapate in this! Thanks for coming up with this Leah....I know I am not explaning this correctly so go check out her great blog for more info...lol.
Here is my first Friday First..got that?! lol..Dylan trying baby food for the first time :)..yummy carrots!

You are going to miss this....

You are going to miss this
You're going want this back
You're going wish these days
Hadn't gone so fast

These are some good times
So take a look around
You may not know it know
But you're going to miss this

awwww I love this Trace Adkins song...have you heard it? I am pretty sure every one on the planet has! Every time I am having a bad day with the boys I think about this song and it really makes me realize that yes they may be driving me crazy right now but they are growing up on me and I need to take a step back and enjoy them. This song really brings me back down where I need to be.

Another tooth!

It looks like Dylan has another tooth...that makes 3 and they are all on the bottom...none on the top! How funny is that? My big boy is just getting way toooooo big and he needs to slow down!

Not so good dreams

I am sitting here at 3:30 in the morning, my heart beating fast and crying. I hate when I have disturbing dreams...I just woke up from a dream about my grandma....she came back to earth but didn't know how long God was going to let her stay....she looked very sick in my dream and I just crying to her asking her please don't go, please don't go.....I remember at one point in my dream I was hugging her and she was staring at me in a mirror it feels like she was really staring at me....at the end of my dream she stops hugging me and walks away saying you know how your cousin Ethan is always saying what a bad life he has..in my dream I say what do you mean...my grandma says I can take him with me...I go look in her room where she had layed down and that is when I wake up terrified, depressed and scared. I don't even have a cousin Ethan so I don't what the heck that even means. I have been having a lot of dreams of her a lot lately or of my mom and her dying at the same time. Do you think it is my grandma talking to me in my dreams? What do all these dreams mean? I am sick of having bad scary dreams...I am afraid to fall asleep at night because of these dreams. I miss my grandma so much and I can't believe that it has already been 3 months since she went to heaven quickly and unexpectedly. Well it wasn't so quick she was on a ventilator for 11 days(I can not remember if that is how long or not)....she had a brain stem stroke and after 11 days it was too much for her body. We never got to say good bye to her. She was basically brain dead....we did not want my grandma living like a vegetable. I stayed in the room watching my grandma take her last breath over and over again...it has really messed with my mind and I can not get the image out of my head. I don't want to be scared anymore.....I don't want to have bad dreams anymore....I don't want to be worried that something is going to happen to me 24/7. I just wish she could be back on this earth and I could talk to her. Please say a prayer for me that I will not have these bad dreams anymore and maybe I can get a little closure from her death...thank you.

Sick

I am sick and tired....literally. I spent the day in the ER turns out I have bronchitis..yuck, blah, ugh, grrrrr. I am so upset...I do not have time to be sick right now. It is summer time and my kiddos are on the go. The doctor told me to stay out of the heat and that really sucks my kids live in the pool during the summer...I got put on Zpac and I hope this clears up really soon. They are also telling me that I can't lift my baby and well that just is not going to happen....he is a mammas boy and loves to be held by mommy. My mom is coming over to help tomorrow thank goodness!! I don't know what the heck I would do if I had to take care of all three kiddos by myself while being sick. I am in so much pain my chest is killing me and my head is throbbing :(. Wish me luck that this all passes quickly.